Blogging With Spirit

New Mythology of Love

webmaster — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 20:25:14 +0000

In This Issue

Why Men Are From Mars
Why Women Come From Venus

Why Men Are From Mars

Jane Ellen wrote in:

Dear Spirit,

Why are men said to come from Mars rather than another planet or a different god?

Spirit: Because Mars is closer to humanity than the other western gods. They tend to be more transcendent and fixed in their nature

And if you look deeply, you can see that Mar’s career is evocative of male history in general: Originally, Mars was worshiped as a fertility god; and later – with the development of agriculture – he also became known as the protector of cattle. It wasn’t until the Roman Empire began to take shape that Mars became the God of War.

Of course, men’s gift of fertility was built into their physical design, as well as their role as providers and protectors of the species.

Yet, it wasn’t until the beginning of civilization that they evolved from hunters to warriors. Then, as chiefs of state, they brought forth their gift of ‘Ethos’ – or group ethical behavior in the form of law and order. The way Mars ruled his army – which included the ritual purification of weapons – is an example of this.

Jane Ellen: What was the spiritual significance of the weapons ritual?

Spirit: It meant that the men were to cleanse their heart of any previous bloodshed, and strengthen it once again to face the Enemy.

Jane Ellen: That is a fascinating description of why men connect with Mars. Yet, wasn’t he also a notorious philanderer and egotist?

Spirit: He was those things also. And he does carry the archetype of the Eternal Youth. Eternal Youths generally hold onto their brash sense of entitlement that says they don’t really need to grow up.

Jane Ellen: What about Mars relationship with Venus? And why has it come to symbolize the relationship between men and women?

Spirit: He was her Conquering Hero; and she was his Goddess of Love. That’s what attracted them to one another – and still does.

The Mars in men is still looking for the Goddess of Love in the woman he partnered with; and the Venus in women is still looking for the Hero she fell for in her man.

Why Women Come From Venus

Jane Ellen wrote in:

Dear Spirit,

Why are women said to come from Venus rather than a different goddess?

Spirit: Not unlike Mars, Venus’s career is closer to women’s history under the rule of patriarchy than that of other goddesses. In fact, her role as a goddess began to take shape during the time of Julius Caesar. Before then, her domain was limited to cultivated plants and gardens. Caesar elevated her status by connecting her to Aphrodite, the Greek Goddess of Love. He also increased women’s status by elevating them to the level of true partnership with men – not in a civil sense – but in the home. So, Venus – as the symbol of feminine identity, evolved into the goddess of domestic life in addition to her other roles.

Under Christian influence, her body style evolved from the voluptuous women portrayed in classical art to the image of the slender maiden portrayed with such eloquence in Botticelli’s famous work: “The Birth of Venus”.

Jane Ellen: Why did the Christian church care what size women were?

Spirit: They wanted women to be more chaste; and to look up to men in the way a Youthful Maiden would, rather than embody the Great Mother archetype whose size and weight suggested greater authority.

Though no longer chaste, the ideal feminine in contemporary culture is still associated with the beauty of the Youthful Maiden; while the Eternal Youth in men is typically associated with his attitude toward life more than his age.

Jane Ellen: Isn’t that unfair to women?

Spirit: Yes; it’s a holdover from chauvinism that needs revising.

Jane Ellen: How do these archetypes impact the overall relationship between men and women?

Spirit: It makes the ideal relationship more youth oriented: In a positive sense, that can mean remaining young at heart. In a negative sense, it can create an undertow of immature expectations and disappointment in one another that can destroy their love connection.

Jane Ellen: How do we evolve beyond the limitations of these archetypes?

Spirit: By honoring what they have to teach us; by coming to terms with their shadow; and by creating a New Mythology of Love based on the return to Source.

The Use Of Hypnotherapy To Create Lasting Change

webmaster — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 20:21:05 +0000

Spirit: Many of you have asked why traditional therapy – and even years of spiritual practice do not always work to create lasting change. If this is the case for you, it is likely that the work you have done did not reach the subconscious layer of early conditioning. One way to reach the subconscious is through hypnotherapy.

Hypnotherapy is a process designed to retrain the subconscious to know how to change. The subconscious is the locus of early conditioning that generally causes problems in behavior, mood and pattern repetition.

It can work powerfully!

One way hypnotherapy works is to intrude on the conscious mind through such techniques as ‘surprise’, ‘distraction’, storytelling and repetition – so that rational thought stops long enough to allow the subconscious to listen.

The subconscious mind is formed at an earlier stage in utero than the neo cortex. It is part of the development of the mid brain. The mid brain is the location of the deep strata of core emotions, such as anger, fear, sorrow and joy. We humans share a similar midbrain structure with other mammals.

Clearly, humans have a better developed rational ability by far. And yet in order to retrain subconscious learning, it is necessary to speak the language of the subconscious which is more fluid – based on the energy, meaning and feeling behind the words. Once the subconscious is helped, problem behaviors and patterns can be altered from deep within. It is time for all of us to begin the work of subconscious healing. Today, hypnotherapy is one of the main ways such healing can be explored.

Another way hypnotherapy can work is through the power of suggestion. Suggestion that is spoken directly to the subconscious works – provided it is in keeping with the needs of the body-mind as a whole. Negative suggestions possess negative power – so it is important when choosing a hypnotherapist to make certain they understand what type of suggestions are best for you. Positive suggestions that the subconscious can relate to as true work best. Of course, as in most learning it is good to repeat positive suggestions in a relaxed state of mind.

Self suggestion is an excellent way to experience hypnotherapy on your own. In a relaxed state, you can light a candle, burn some incense, use a flower essence or whatever you choose to create a ritual element to ‘anchor’ or help deepen the suggestion. Suggestions that work generally contain two statements that complement each other – one for the conscious, the other for the doubling effect on the subconscious. If you like, you can try this one:

We are healing the earth together.

It is a good thing.

Pet Week – As The Crow Flies

webmaster — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 16:00:37 +0000

In This Issue:
As the Crow Flies

The Gentleman Squirrel

As the Crow Flies Jenn from Santa Barbara, CA writes:

Dear Spirit, when I was hiking the other day, I found a wounded crow. At first, I didn’t know if he was alive or not. Then, I saw that he was breathing. Gently, I began to pet him. Then, his eyes opened and he looked up at me, but he didn’t move. I dripped water over his beak and, when he gurgled, I gave him more. He kept looking at me, without moving. Then, I heard the cawing of a crow family. They flew up in the trees forming a semi-circle in front of us. The wounded crow tried to answer their call, but no sound came through. I thought maybe they wanted me to leave. Though I did feel torn about whether or not to take him home with me. I ended up lifting him onto a stone. Then, I said a prayer and left him with the other crows. Last night, I had a dream: He was sitting on a bush looking at me. Do you think I should have taken him with me?

- Jenn D.

Spirit: You were right to leave. The crow’s neck was broken, and he was close to death. You could not have saved him.

Jenn: I didn’t see any blood or feathers nearby. Can you tell me how he got hurt?

Spirit: He was attacked by a circling hawk. You didn’t see blood around because it cauterized before it reached the surface of the skin. The crow’s neck is small and contains very little blood.

The crow family you met had left him for dead. When they noticed you sitting by him, they became curious and they flew back. They made sure not to settle in the trees behind you so you would know that they came as friends. They weren’t asking you to leave. On the contrary, they were touched by your presence. You were there to comfort and bless the crow, and you taught his friends a lesson about the needs of the dying. Now, those crows can teach other crows what they learned from the experience.

Now I have a question to ask you

Jenn: What is it?

Spirit: Why don’t you go back and receive the blessing the crow has for you?

Jenn: What is that?

Spirit: A few of his feathers. As the native American culture understands, it is part of the birds’ manna to be able to share what they’ve learned in the life they left behind – as well as their personal power by permitting humans who honor them to keep their feathers.

Jenn: Is that what the crow was saying in my dream?

Spirit: Indeed, and he came to thank you.

The Gentleman Squirrel Jane Ellen wrote in: The elder squirrel I feed came to the door today and – after his usual greeting, began eating his breakfast He continued eating and eating – even though he has grown quite plump. After awhile – I asked him to step aside and allow his brother, as well as several birds who were also in line to share the meal. The result was: he ignored my request.

Is he holding onto his dominance? Or is he overeating for emotional reasons?

-Jane Ellen

Spirit: Both. For one thing, he feels his age; and he is afraid if he steps aside, the younger male will start to dominate the morning meal. He misses the days when he was more agile and it makes him feel grumpy – so he overeats to compensate his loss.

Jane: Can I ask you another question?

Spirit: Of course

Jane: Is there something You can do to help him feel better about himself?

Spirit: Yes. Like most aging males, your squirrel friend is learning to appreciate more passive experiences – such as your friendship, the new tastes in your seed bowl -which speak to him of far away places. And he is given the freedom to go about his day pretty much as he wishes. You have guaranteed his survival. Beyond that, his existence is filled with the prayer in his heart: “Please God – may I leap again this day?”

Soul Week – Helping A Loved One Pass

webmaster — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 14:00:31 +0000

In This Issue

Jean’s Choice
The Stages of Loss
How to Help a Loved One Pass

Jean’s Choice:

Joy from Denver, CO writes:

Dear Spirit, My mother is approaching 90. She lives in an assisted care facility and seems close to her time of passing. She fell two weeks ago and, although she did not break any bones, since that time, she has refused solid food. Is there something I can do to help her let go?

Spirit: Yes. She has had a series of small strokes; and she is in a crisis of faith. What is her religious affiliation?

Joy: Science of Mind.

Spirit: And her first name?

Joy: Jean.

Spirit: Jean is confusing the failure of her physical body with the waning of her soul light. It would be good to reassure her that the feeling of weakness or growing dim is not permanent – and that I am there to help her lift out when she’s ready to let go of her old life.

At present, she is clinging to a particular memory that may keep her chained to a pattern of loss in future lives. Do you know which one I mean?

Joy: I think so. She lost her significant other ten years ago; and she never got over it.

Spirit: That’s the experience I am referring to. She feels as though she lost her other half when he died. And since she is a truth seeker, I would like her to realize that if she does not rejoin him, it does not mean the end of light. The truth is – he was not good for her. It would be better for Jean to come out of denial and release her idealized version of their relationship, so she can be free to realize her greater identity. She is at a real choice point.

Joy: Should I say something to her about this?

Spirit: Yes. Please go ahead and tell her what I said. Then ask her to take my advice into prayer and meditation on her next life. Then step back and allow her to decide.

The Stages of Loss

Linda from Portland, OR writes:

Dear Spirit, My mother is in her 80s and feeling deeply depressed. Yet she continues to act surprised and claim she doesn’t know why.

Of course, it is obvious why. She is the only survivor among her siblings; most of her close friends have also passed on, and my father died several years ago. He was her best friend.

Is it my job to help her come out of denial?

Spirit: Your mother is going through the stages of loss the great psychologist, Elisabeth Kubler Ross described – including denial, anger, bargaining and depression, without having reached the final stage of acceptance. And you are having difficulty accepting her process. Work on letting go of your tendency to reverse your old role with her by becoming an overprotective or a critical mother.

Your mother really does understand why she’s so depressed; and she’s working on accepting it.

How to Help a Loved One Pass

Many of us grieve the impending death of a loved one. Yet, death is the sloughing off of an outworn body and way of life so a new, more expanded identity can be achieved. It is not a tragic denouement that spells the end of self. So, it is important not to add to your loved one’s burden by projecting the end of life onto them. In that sense, the time of passing can be experienced – not only as a time of loss, but of celebration.

If you can hold the balance between those two sides, you will help create the optimum environment for your loved one to heal.

Relationship Week – Basic Ingredients For A Satisfying Love Relationship

webmaster — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 14:00:01 +0000

In This Issue

A Husband’s Nightmare
A Wife’s Nightmare
Five Basic Ingredients of a Satisfying Love Connection

A Husband’s Nightmare

Bill M. from San Francisco, CA wrote in:

Dear Spirit, I had a nightmare the other night. I was trying to protect my wife from an intruder outside our home. I locked the doors. And then, I was standing by her side in our living room. I noticed it was hard for me to feel much. At the end of the dream, I realized that the intruder was a part of me that felt locked out and was full of emotion. Does the dream mean I am in the wrong marriage?

Spirit: Why are you trying to protect your wife from this part of yourself?

Bill: The intruder wants to leave my marriage.

Spirit: Why is that?

Bill: Since I was laid off my job, my wife has withheld sex, and treated me with disrespect.

Spirit: Why do you think that is?

Bill: I can tell you it’s because of money.

Spirit: Have you asked her why?

Bill: She says it’s because I’m not myself.

Spirit: Is there some truth to that?

Bill: Naturally, I’ve been depressed. And I can’t help but let her know that.

Spirit: How long has it been since you worked?

Bill: About 10 months.

Spirit: Underneath your depression, you are really very angry; and you are projecting your feelings of humiliation onto your wife.

Bill: What do you mean?

Spirit: You are blaming her for your loss of self respect. So, it is hard for you to tell your wife still loves you and believes in your talent. She is also angry at you for losing your self confidence. Of course, withholding sex is not the best way to express it. Yet, it is not essentially about your paycheck. You are the one who keeps putting yourself down over that.

Bill: It’s not just my paycheck. I had a high level position.

Spirit: That is your ego talking. Your true self understands you are here to be on a more advanced track.

Bill: Can you elaborate?

Spirit: Who you are transcends your old income and position. That’s what the “intruder” in you is really demanding you pay attention to. Do you know who you’re here to be?

Bill: An artist?

Spirit: That’s the kind of lifestyle he has in mind.

Bill: My wife will never accept it.

Spirit: How do you know that?

Bill: She wants me to find a job with a big enough salary to hold onto our lifestyle. And, so far – I haven’t found one.

Spirit: What if that’s not your next step?

Bill: She’ll probably leave me.

Spirit: In a sense, that’s why you want to leave first. Why second guess her, rather than discuss your realization – and give her the option to join you on your new adventure?

Bill: What if I fail?

Spirit: How can you fail at what you’re here to do?

A Wife’s Nightmare

Andrea A. from Los Angeles, CA wrote in:

Dear Spirit, I had the most disturbing dream last night: My husband and I were on an island that was sinking into the ocean. We had very little time left My husband was trying to escape and refused to take me with him. I woke up sobbing. Does he intend to leave me in real life?

Spirit: What is happening in your marriage that is catastrophic?

Andrea: We are going under financially.

Spirit: How did that happen?

Andrea: The economy; and my husband made some bad investments.

Spirit: Why does he blame you?

Andrea: That’s what I would like to know.

Spirit: He is partly projecting his self blame onto you; and yet, there is a deeper reason

Andrea: What is that?

Spirit: You have cherished your lifestyle over him.

Andrea: I thought we cherished it together.

Spirit: Of course, he enjoyed it as well. Yet, he feels you are mainly responsible for the excessive amount of – is it credit card debt you share?

Andrea: I guess I am guilty when it comes to that; I just never dreamed the economy would crash. Is that why he barely speaks to me and comes home so late at night?

Spirit: That’s part of it. How late at night does he come home?

Andrea: Often after 2 a.m. Is he having an affair?

Spirit: Yes.

Andrea: What should I do about it?

Spirit: Have you tried confronting him?

Andrea: He just denies it.

Spirit: Does he offer an excuse?

Andrea: He says he falls asleep at work.

Spirit: He is waiting for you to leave him.

Andrea: So he can hold onto the house?

Spirit: To some degree.

Andrea: What else?

Spirit: You have been together for so many years. There’s still a part of him that doesn’t want to hurt you.

Andrea: Is our marriage really over?

Spirit: Why leave the answer up to him? What is your opinion?

Andrea: We haven’t really been intimate in years.

Spirit: How do you feel about that?

Andrea: Aside from the children, we don’t have that much in common. And they’re all out of the house. I’ve thought of leaving so many times.

Spirit: Why did you stay?

Andrea: Part of it was economic; and I didn’t want to fail at marriage. Then, there’s the fear of being alone.

Spirit: Now is the time to learn to enjoy your own company – as well as expand your circle of friends. What else would you like to do?

Andrea: I have thought of going back to school.

Spirit: That is a promising plan. It’s still not too late to become your own success.

Five Basic Ingredients of a Satisfying Love Connection

Mutual Respect
Compatibility
Soul Connection
Sexual Attraction
Intimacy

For men, respect tends to be the prerequisite for happiness; and, for women – intimacy. When those are lost, the relationship will become a battleground or an empty playing field. Aside from those two, when one of the five is missing, it is still possible to enjoy life together; When two or more aren’t there, it is likely that one or both partners will feel unmet. How would you rate your relationship in each of these categories?
Share your answers below.